McaleerGeyer323

出典: くみこみックス

tommy jordan - Just a few months ago my son Nathan, age 13, declared he wanted a FaceBook account. Most of his good friends had one, and the man wanted one, too.

After my stomach knotted a bit and I said a silent prayer, I agreed he could open a FaceBook account, but explained to him there'd be certain "conditions."

Like all child today, Nathan often concerns father and mother with requests with this thing or that thing he absolutely can't live without. And the man always comes prepared with convincing arguments...why he craves a cellphone, the newest gaming innovation, or some other 15 songs from iTunes.

His cases are strong, but my husband and I are united within our position that Nathan shouldn't get precisely what he asks for. If he did, what can there be to look toward, to work towards, to dream about? That is why Nathan doesn't always have an XBox, PlayStation or Wii. He doesn't own a PSP rather than has had a GameBoy.

Everything being said, Nathan has always stood a computer. Starting at 36 months old with a kid's VTech computer purchased from ToysRUs, he's upgraded every couple of years to the latest, greatest, yet reasonable version...however the creme de la creme was his iMac which he got for Christmas a year ago. He doesn't actually miss out on a whole lot. He still grows to play games (only it's those designed for a computer), but additionally along with his computer he creates music using his guitar, records and enhances songs with GarageBand, adds original soundtracks to their own iMovies, and uses it to accomplish his homework. Though to not excess, we encourage his computer interest.

So when Nathan stumbled on me along with his FaceBook request, I said "yes," albeit with some trepidation. Like most parents, We have heard the problem reports and knew the possibility danger that the Internet and sites like FaceBook and MySpace could cause to get a vulnerable teenager. But I'm also an advocate of informing and educating our kids in order they mature they can increase the risk for right decisions for their own reasons. It's just that in-between time from child to young adult that's so perilous nowadays and causes us parents to look gray, particularly with the added chance of the web.

So that's why the "conditions." I explained to Nathan it had been similar to driving a vehicle. It will be foolish of me or his father handy over the keys at 16 or 17 and expect him to operate a vehicle safely without the right training, instruction and guidance. The same holds true with all the Internet and, in cases like this, having a FaceBook account. There's things he has to know to maintain himself safe, to protect his privacy and that of his friends', also to comprehend the "ins and outs" of safe maneuvering via a teen's social network.

facebook parenting - So what were these "conditions?"

1. The email that Nathan registered his FaceBook account with was one that I had usage of. That meant at any time I could go into his account, take a peek and make sure everything on his FaceBook met the "Mom and pa Everything Looks Okay" test. Also, something that was written on his wall found me via email notification.

2. He agreed to "Random FaceBook Reviews" where we'd talk about to consider us through his account. These were meant to be instructional, basically fun, low-key reviews of the he shared in the profile, pictures (if any) he displayed, the thing that was compiled by his friends on his Wall, bumper stickers he collected as well as other things he might offer for view by his friends.

3. He could only "Friend" kids he knew, and absolutely no adults (except for his dad, me, and his awesome Aunt Carol).

4. The pc that he used could be positioned in a public spot in our house and not in the room or behind a closed door.

We constantly adjust as things change like FaceBook updates and extra features, nevertheless the operative word here is "we." It's really a "family affair." Nathan recognizes that father and mother are involved because we're most worried about his safety and not about attempting to catch him doing something wrong. Now, it isn't always hanging around; we do have conflicts, however the important thing is the fact that we keep your communication lines open.

And also you know, I've seen some results using the FaceBook experience, also. The teenage years are often tough territory to move...particularly the early teens. You have some teens maturing quickly, while others not so much. And it's really hard...on the children. But what I'm picking up through the messages as well as other FaceBook dialog from Nathan's "friends," both boys and girls, is an ease with which they communicate through this medium...bypassing that awkwardness that individuals encountered as teens. Gurus Nathan about that, if FaceBook caused it to be much easier to speak with girls or other people he may not usually meet in his band of friends. He agreed it was a pressure-free, fun way to speak to someone who he could not ordinarily feel comfortable conversing with.

FaceBook now offers a way for all to customize their space, encouraging our youngsters to be creative and giving "friends" an overview into what makes our children stand out. Finally, it has a backdrop which to have instructional conversations with our kids. For example, a couple weeks ago I had been seeing some emails arriving that have been not favorable towards a particular young female. I made use of it a learning opportunity, emphasizing empathy and reminding Nathan how he would not want others to speak about him the way in which his friends were discussing this young girl...a genuine learning opportunity that without FaceBook we would have missed.

tommy jordan - And i'm penning this, Nathan comes into my office and asks, "Hey, mom, there exists a funny bumper sticker about... (some marginally inappropriate saying). Any idea what? Can one put it up on my FaceBook? I believe it's hilarious!!

"Alright," Certainly while i remind myself this can be a predictable developmental milestone. I am not too old to remember a few things i was like at this age. Pick your battles, Susan, just pick your battles.